Ask A Sex Goddess

By Sex Goddess, WireTap
Posted on May 5, 2007, Printed on November 22, 2008
http://www.wiretapmag.org/sex/43092/

Dear Sex Goddess,

It's possible that I am an imbecile for even writing about this, but I am confused. I just started seeing a woman who is the most amazing alive woman I have ever met. She loves the same things I love, she loves to be outside in the world and she loves to laugh this stunning laugh and her face always looks like it's smiling. We just finished our third date and she told me that she felt (as I do) this is magical. But then she said that she wanted to alert me to something important, which is that she is HIV+. It's not a question of whether I will fall in love with her or not, it's already begun, I don't feel I could walk away but what am I supposed to do? I have worked in the AIDS world, I know the risks, I'm scared. Please help.

Boy In Love

Dear Boy In Love,

You are already doing exactly what you are supposed to do -- opening your heart to someone who amazes you, being honest about confusion and fears, making her laugh. You know the risks, and surely you know all the major moves forward in care, life expectancy, birthing, nutrition -- an HIV+ life is a full life, be responsible about your communication with each other and believe in the healing and transformative power of love. Every HIV+ person in my life only blossoms under the light of love.

SG

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Do you have a question? Email SG at SexAndRelationships@WireTapMag.org.

Rules:

1. I hate rules!
2. There are no stupid questions, only stupid hang-ups.
3. Pleasure came before political correctness, and so should you!
4. Love yourself first.

Who: Who I am is unimportant. I do, however, enjoy sex, dally in various relationships, and on top of that I am an organizer by trade, or perhaps faith. I declare here and now that I know as much as anyone about sex and relationships -- which is roughly nothing and everything.

Why: Organizers, activists, change makers, closet progressives -- people trying to save the world often have a hard time figuring out how to ... do it. Whatever it might be at the moment -- love, dominate, submit, indulge, deny, give, take, fight, let go, wonder, know. I secretly suspect that if everyone were able to find the freedom to really love and please themselves (not to mention each other), the world would be a much more peaceful place.

Click here to access all of SG's sex and relationships wisdom.

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