That White World: Author and Activist Jennifer Calderon

By Scott Thill, WireTap
Posted on November 22, 2007, Printed on September 7, 2008
http://www.wiretapmag.org/arts/43305/

Each one, teach one. That's hip-hop's core message, and Jennifer Calderon has learned it.

She has also merged her personal history with that righteous educational mission in her recently released debut novel That White Girl to formulate a fiction of gang life from the other side of the racial prism. Written with an eye to both danger and redemption under Calderon's alter alias JLove, That White Girl's Caucasian naïf Amber rolls through the stoned streets of Denver and ends up in a Crips gang called the Rollin' 30s. When things fall apart, as they always do in gangs, Amber is forced to hightail it to California only to find redemption in hip-hop and community service.

Like the Amber she invented, Calderon's story only started in a gang: It has ended in projects like R.E.A.C.Hip-Hop and We Got Issues, which spawned a well-received book of its own. In other words, JLove's real life has survived its troubled early chapters. The finale is getting better by the day.

WireTap: How did you end up in a gang, and how did you get out?

Jennifer Calderon: I ended up in a gang because I was looking for a way out of my pain, confusion and spiritual void. I was in a place where friendship and community meant more to me than anything. The gang I rolled with gave me what I so desperately needed: love, acceptance and power. I got out the only way I thought possible, by leaving the state. My two homies got locked up, and before they got put away, they told me to get out while I still could. So I bounced to Cali.

WireTap: Why the book? Do you think That White Girl could help others similarly caught up?

I decided to write the book to share my story with other people as a way to provoke thought, spark dialogue and hopefully give young people some reasons to not get into negative situations in their lives. It is my hope that this book, and other forms of creative expression, do help people see a different way and can help them make better decisions for themselves.

WireTap: What is the lesson of That White Girl? What would you like readers to take away from it?

The most important is love for self and understanding that every single human being on this planet is a unique miracle that has something beautiful to offer this world. If you have self-worth and you believe you deserve love and a life of abundance, then anything is possible. I hope that readers get that from the book.

WireTap: How did your race determine your difference, in the way you were treated, received and accepted?

My race had everything to do with how I was treated throughout my life, and that is due to institutional racism and white supremacy, which is still alive and thriving in this country. That is why when we did dirt, my homies who were black went to jail, and I got sent home with a slap on my wrist. That's why I got passes in life and others did not. As a white person, I am the receiver of 400-plus years of affirmative action.

WireTap: Some feel whiteness is not a color but a privilege, while others feel it is not a race at all.

I've been taught that race is a social construct, meaning that nobody is white. Back in the day, in order to control the working class and ensure that they would not band together to overthrow the oppressive elite upper class, racial classifications were created and disseminated to cause a social disease. What we have now is the result of hundreds of years of lies and conditioning which has us believing that there is more than one race.

Now, despite my belief that there are no separate races, just cultures, because of the racist society we live in, I use the terms in order to communicate and work through these issues. Until we can finally demolish all forms of racial inequity, I will talk about the issues with terminology that everyone understands. When you go up in a high school, or just about anywhere, to give a workshop about racism, it's hard to start with "There's no such thing as a white person." Know what I mean?

WireTap: How did hip-hop save you?

Hip-hop saved me because it gave me something to believe in that was bigger than myself and my circumstances. Simultaneously, it was cool, revolutionary, full of energy, fun and action. I was able to find other people come together because of our love of the culture. And it went so beyond race; it was about your skills and love of the culture, not about your skin color.

WireTap: Since hip-hop has mainstreamed, do enough realize it can still be used as a force for change?

I still believe that hip-hop can be -- and is -- a force for social change. Hip-hop is a natural place to organize because of all the wonderful young people who love it. And you can never take it away from its roots of making noise and making a point. It still brings people together in positive ways.

WireTap: But it also churns out a lot of blinged-out bullshit.

Mainstream hip-hop is in trouble. I do not know what the future holds for the mainstream, but the good news is that there is a radical social-justice hip-hop movement that does not even give a shit about bling, consumerism and what R. Kelly and them are doing. We are alive and organizing, from REACH Hip-Hop to the National (Hip-Hop) Political Convention, to Boots Riley, to Hip-Hop Sustains, to the Hip-Hop Mental Health Project, to Davey D, the list is endless! From individuals to organizations, we are strategically and methodically taking shit over. Don't sleep on hip-hop activism!

WireTap: What are some of things about hip-hop you find to be still problematic?

What bothers me about mainstream hip-hop is how we treat each other. Women are continually seen as objects; we are not valued, loved or respected. Videos, magazines and lyrics all contribute to dehumanizing us, and nobody wins when a woman is beaten down emotionally. My son loves hip-hop, and I can't even let him watch videos because of how the women are portrayed. I refuse to have a son who does not respect women. The other thing I can't stand is the consumerism and the lack of balance in content. Both of those bring us down as a community as opposed to building us up.

WireTap: Someone was saying that, after all these years, there are less female hip-hop groups than ever.

True, but I'm sure you know that hip-hop is a microcosm of the larger society. I am so tired of everybody blaming shit on hip-hop, like we created sexism and misogyny and consumerism. All of us have been taught fucked-up things as we've grown up in the United States. Unfortunately, our lives have to be about raising our consciousness, reprogramming ourselves and regaining our humanity. That goes for everybody, not just the hip-hop community.

WireTap: What role do men play in that trend? And how complicit are women in it?

Men need to work on learning how to love and respect all women. Women need to work on making them by not settling for their bullshit, knowing in our hearts that we are worth better. We've all got roles to play in healing our unhealthy relationships. It's not just the men; it's important for us too.

WireTap: So would you call yourself a feminist? How would you define the concept?

I don't call myself a feminist, and I don't know if I am viewed as one. The feminist movement did a lot for women in this society, which of course I am thankful for. But it was fraught with race and class issues, as it was mostly a white, middle-class women's movement. Feminism, the way it lives, doesn't speak to me. I fight for what I believe is just for all people, but especially young women. So I'm not so concerned with titles like that. My life's work is to do everything in my power to support as many young women as possible to find their calling in life and ignite their magnificence. The world would be a better place.

Check out Calderon's website for more information on her work.

Scott Thill runs the online mag Morphizm.com. His writing has appeared on Salon, XLR8R, All Music Guide, Wired and others.

© 2008 Wiretap Magazine. All rights reserved.
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