Ask A Sex Goddess

By Sex Goddess, October 19, 2007

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‘Since I met him, he keeps bringing forth that inappropriate desire I haven't felt since the high school locker room! What to do?’

I am a happy 32-year-old, gay black man. I am gorgeous, I have a gorgeous boyfriend, my job pays well and treats me right, I love my home, and blah, blah, blah... A week ago I met a man who is nothing short of 180 degrees different from me — new age, meditating, feng shui, wearing CROCS and basically not my usual sexy. And through his Zen cool he slung much game at me! Since I met him, he keeps coming to mind, bringing forth that inappropriate desire I haven't felt since the high school locker room! I want to give up my money hunger and be his boo! What to do?

Kanye Doppelganger

Dear KD

Drop everything, swear off attachments, and feng shui your apartment cause you are about to go on the Zen Love Ride of your Life! Or not.

If you are only interested in him because he is so different from you, and you can both live with that, and your relationship is open to such adventures — have at each other, though be prepared for a serious change of pace. But if you take a moment of opposites attracting as a sign that it’s time for a lifestyle overhaul, maybe the truth is that you just aren't as happy as you think. Meditate on that!

SG

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Rules:

1. I hate rules!
2. There are no stupid questions, only stupid hang-ups.
3. Pleasure came before political correctness, and so should you!
4. Love yourself first.

Who: Who I am is unimportant. I do, however, enjoy sex, dally in various relationships, and on top of that I am an organizer by trade, or perhaps faith. I declare here and now that I know as much as anyone about sex and relationships -- which is roughly nothing and everything.

Why: Organizers, activists, change makers, closet progressives -- people trying to save the world often have a hard time figuring out how to ... do it. Whatever it might be at the moment -- love, dominate, submit, indulge, deny, give, take, fight, let go, wonder, know. I secretly suspect that if everyone were able to find the freedom to really love and please themselves (not to mention each other), the world would be a much more peaceful place.

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